It is the morning after. I said my final goodbye to my loyal receptionist, canine soul mate and beloved golden retriever Gracie yesterday afternoon at around 3:20PM. We brought in Dr. Ann Soinski DVM from a wonderful service called A Gentle Farewell to bring Gracie the peace she needed. It was a beautiful goodbye.
The video above was created on my laptop during her final hours and helped me fully celebrate her life while we were close. I will probably always cry when I watch it. The life we shared was amazing.
Gracie’s last days were pleasant enough. I know we did a great job keeping her comfortable and pampered right up to the very end. It’s still incredibly hard to make that decision to end the suffering. A devoted dog naturally resists leaving. In fact, Gracie failed the exam to become a therapy dog was because she refused to remain in a stay position if I went out of her sight. That darn dog insisted being at my side at all times. Her final weeks made me painfully aware of how important my presence was to her. Even in her exhausted and frail state, she would follow me room to room. I did my best to keep my movements to a minimum.
Gracie also made it a priority to personally greet every single office client, right up through the last appointment on 9/28/18. I had cleared my schedule on Monday October 1 for a full day of writing, so there was no opportunity to greet anyone on her last day, but I bet she would have tried. That was her job. She was especially good at helping my clients get grounded through her presence. I often wonder if this was her soul agreement. She must have greeted 1000 or more people in her short life. She was a super senior visitor at the nearby assisted living facility and also calmly enjoyed any moment when a child or passing stranger would ask if they could pet her.
Gracie will be remembered for her wildly wagging tail, the happy “Scooby-doo sounds”, snoring, love of treats and her unconditional affection for people of all ages and sharing life so peacefully with our cats Sig and Naughty Violet.
I’ve checked in with Gracie’s spirit and received confirmation that she is fully integrated back into the light. We will plan to adopt another dog or puppy in the future and I’m pretty sure Gracie’s spirit will find her way back to me. Her favorite command was “come” and even if she were out sniffing around in the woods, without hesitation she would rapidly reappear at my side. I know that even now I can call her guardian spirit to me.
My friend Mark Shields sent this lovely quote today, which I share with all who have shared the heart connection with a dog. Give your furry friends a hug for me.
“Dogs, lives are short, too short, but you know that going in. You know the pain is coming, you’re going to lose a dog, and there’s going to be great anguish, so you live fully in the moment with her, never fail to share her joy or delight in her innocence, because you can’t support the illusion that a dog can be your lifelong companion. There’s such beauty in the hard honesty of that, in accepting and giving love while always aware that it comes with an unbearable price. Maybe loving dogs is a way we do penance for all the other illusions we allow ourselves and the mistakes we make because of those illusions.”
― Dean Koontz, The Darkest Evening of the Year”
